Getting Stuff Done by Not Being Mean to Yourself

What I Witnessed This Week

When Talented People Beat Themselves Up

 

Friday's Tabernacle call had me tearing up. I watched brilliant, talented spiritual solopreneurs beat themselves up for not being "further along." There's so much pressure to intimidatingly label ourselves as "creatives" with no action to back it up.

Serap, managing 20 people at her day job, comes home to build her business and feels like everything's "so difficult to do." Marike, rebuilding after losing everything in the Altadena fires, grinding on her candle club because she thinks she "should" be there already.

"I feel like there are so many construction sites on my plate," Serap said. "I haven't finished one thing really."

 

Militant Schedules

Susan Piver Helped Me Understand Why

 

There's this meditation teacher, Susan Piver, who wrote something where the title says it all "Getting stuff done by not being mean to yourself."

She talked about setting militant schedules - rise at 5am, meditate 5:30-6:30, journal 6:30-7:30 - only to fail more than succeed, which made her furious at herself.

I get angrier and angrier at myself, she wrote. Curse my lack of discipline. Shame myself for watching Battlestar Galactica (again) instead of writing. It spirals out of control until I either give in to lying on the couch or somehow manage to squeeze out a day of discipline, whereupon I immediately begin bullying myself to repeat this tomorrow.

It sucks.

 

 

The Permission Shift

What Would Feel Good Today?

 

Then one day, feeling like she had nothing to lose, Piver asked herself: What if I did what I felt like doing, when I felt like doing it?

She got scared immediately. "If I'm not vigilant about making myself do stuff, I won't do anything."

But the irony is that following pleasure's lead, she had her most productive day, completing tasks she usually yelled at herself to do.

This connects directly to those 90-minute sprints I wrote about last week. My burnt-out thumb stopped aching not because I worked harder, but because I stopped fighting myself.

 

 

What I'm Seeing in Tabernacle

The Creative Process Isn't Linear

 

Right now, my Residents are in the heart of our second touchstone CONTINUE - the whirlwind of positioning messages and editing mood boards has them all looking messy and chaotic. But this is where their beautiful voices emerge.

I told Serap this week: "Your business right now is a Substack newsletter. That's what we're building. You cannot wait to work on that."

Not because she needs to monetize immediately. She has her full-time job for that. But because the pressure to have it all figured out is blocking her joy in the actual writing.

Marike was grinding on her candle club until she gave herself permission to work on what felt good - the painted graphics for her newsletter. "It's like going where the energy is," she said.

 

 

Your Permission Slip

Finding the Joy in Your Work

 

This week, ask yourself: How would you like to spend your time today?

Not what you should do.
Not what's on your militant schedule.
What would actually feel good.

Maybe it's that 20-minute sketch instead of forcing yourself through another sales page edit. Maybe it's writing one vulnerable paragraph about your spiritual journey instead of mapping out a 12-week course you're not ready to sell.

You've got your serious job, your responsibilities. This creative work? This is your fun project. You cannot wait to work on it.

Find the joy in the communication. Take the pressure off needing to monetize your gifts right now. The pleasure is in the process.

 

Låpsley's album "I'm a Hurricane / I'm a Woman in Love" - it's the perfect soundtrack for this whole "following pleasure's lead" energy I've been talking about.

 

 

Until next Sunday, keep following pleasure's lead,